No, I didn't see the movie yet and that is not what this post is about...I sit here in Saint Mary's library stealing their internet and sense of belonging to an academic world. I've decided to stop worrying about things. I want to fill my life with beauty and simple little moments of happiness. Rent will be paid. I will find a career someday. I will not always be single (and if I am, I will make the most of it - I will live like those amazing independent women that take trips to France and do whatever they want because they are only concerned with how their trip turns out). I will leave something meaningful behind in this world. I don't know how any of these things will be done, but they will. God's got me. He knows what's up. I just have to keep moving, keep breathing, keep working and keep taking these days; sitting by a window, looking at the bleak sky reminded of days in England or Maine in October. I have entered a place where wild things can happen. I am working right now to pay off debt and once that's done I can save for whatever may come next. I would love to see Venice or Sierra Leonne (sp?). I would love to buy a house somewhere and completely gut it to its frame and start over. I would love to take two weeks and do nothing but cook dinner, read books, and sit in a hammock and watch the sun set. We'll see. I may move to Oxford to get my Ph.D. in 2-3 years instead of 5-6 here in the states. I may open an inn or a bookstore and settle down in a tiny hamlet making enough to live happily. I may work at a restaurant for the rest of my life (God I hope not...). Magical things can happen, here's to opening my eyes.
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